Thursday, 18 June 2015
10 People Every Book Worm Secretly Hates
Remember when I talked about how much I love reading? That probably didn't surprise you much. But love is only appreciated when it is contrasted with hate. like how you only notice the light when it gets real dark. (Clearly, I had to resist the urge to copy paste the lyrics of let her go by passenger here. I'll still link you though. ) So in this post you'll see the flip side of me. The hateful annoyed underbelly of me.
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| Basically, this version of me. |
There’s a very particular
set of people who really annoy the avid reader in me. These people just
effortlessly land in my hate list. These little peeves just drive me nuts.
If you’re one of these people, I HATE YOU. If you’re not on my list, you’re
probably me, albeit a different version of me. And we can be best friends. If
you are on my hate list though, don't worry about it too much, because most of
us book worms have a hate list and then a kill list.
#1 Are you one of those people who live in a
city that has book fairs where you can buy books ‘by weight’, Like x dollars
for a kilo of books and the like? And you and I are friends on social media
where you post pictures of the 27 books you bought for like 10 dollars? I HATE
YOU.
#2 Are
you one of those people who owns a cozy bar or a nice little café or
restaurant? Where you thought it’d be nice to line up the walls with fake books
as décor? I HATE YOU.
#3 Are you one of those
people who borrow books from me and then promptly pack up and move across the
country to some unknown secret state and I have no way to track you down? I
HATE YOU.
#4 Are you one of those
people who borrow books from me and lend it to other people only to tell me
that the other person has lost my book after I’ve asked you for my book
back like 15 times already? I HATE YOU. You really suck. And the worst part is
I’m too nice a person to even be mad at you because it was the other person who
lost my book, not you. Nevertheless, I secretly hate you.
#5 Are you one of those
people who like to point out that I have no boyfriend and no life because I
read too much crime fiction? I HATE YOU.
#6 Are you one of those
people who like to tell me they love reading, and then later clarify by saying
they read a lot of magazines and newspapers? I HATE YOU. And for the last time,
reading magazines and newspapers is not the same thing as reading books. You’ll
feel the difference when I smack you in the face with a real book.
#7 Are you one of those
people who see me intently reading a book and interpret this as ‘not really
doing anything worthwhile’ and choose exactly then to tell me about all the
adorable cute things your crush is always doing. I HATE YOU.
#8 Are you one of those
people with exceptional memory who catch me periodically rereading books and
shoot me judgmental looks and say things like “I thought you already read that
book” or “Why don’t you find something new read?” or even sarcastically ask
“How slow do you read?”. I HATE YOU. And I have one word for you, ALWAYS.
I will always reread that book. And I’ll hope I have selective amnesia
and forget it so I can reread it all over again like it was the first time I
read it. Because guess what, it’s better than Falling in love.
#9 Are you my mom who
thinks I should really put my book down and be more social and say hello to the
aunt who came over who I know is just aching to tell me that the last time she
saw me, I was two feet tall? I HATE YOU. Okay, I don’t hate you. I kinda
love you. But I’m social enough and all that, Mom. I even liked that aunt’s
status about parenting on Facebook. That’s as social as I get.
Did I miss anyone on your
hate list? What’s your book worm pet peeve? Did you find yourself on my hate
list? Do you know someone who has crossed the book worm in you? Let me know in
the comments below!
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If #1 is a thing, then consider them hated by us also. I've never seen books sold by weight before, and so cheaply. That would be fantastic.
ReplyDeleteHmmm, why is it okay to rewatch a favorite movie 100 times, but even reread a book once and people lose their minds?
Also, more and more of the current generation of youth (that makes me sound so old - but include us both) don't read at all. Like, they think books are stupid, antiquated things that old people use. So while being social is great, your mom could have much worse things to complain about. Like you being an illiterate ditz.
Yup. #1 is totally a thing in Mumbai, and a couple of other Indian cities. They're mostly old books, but it's still pretty fantastic.
DeleteAnd, I know right? People.